I am the Scenery

Even though I’m a temp at work, I was invited to attend a group event with my future colleagues. The event was kayaking on Lake Union. It was supposed to be a leisurely tour of the east side of the lake and then a nice lunch at Blue Water Bistro. It had been raining like crazy and everyone was skeptical that we would even go, but the rain stopped and the clouds stayed and the weather was perfect; warm, but not hot, overcast, but not raining.

Hippies

From what I was told, we were very lucky because the water was glass. We kayaked from the south end of Lake Union to the north side, under I-5, through the Montlake Cut and under the 520 bridge into the Arboretum. It was not leisurely because we had a destination and three hours to complete our route, but it was an experience.

When you’re out on the water you have time to really enjoy the scenery. Lake Union is amazing because of the houseboats on the shore lines. Some are art-studios and some are old school. Most of them have tons of potted plants on their docks. It seems like living on a houseboat would be an amazing lifestyle, different than any other.

Groovy Little Houseboat

Of course there is Gas Works park, which looks like somewhere one of Batman's enemies would live. It's situated directly next to an unnaturally-shaped grassy hill which causes one to wonder, "what's with the hill?"

Gasworks Park, Lake Union and Seattle

We rowed our boats and waved to the larger vessels and when my group got ahead of me I realized that we too were part of the scenery. Six colorful kayaks gliding along the lake make an impression. The weather alone was dramatic and to be part of the scenery, on a quiet Monday afternoon was darn cool. I actually got paid to attend this event!

Two days later my tailbone and spine are killing me! However, my abs and upper bod appreciated the attention. Kayaking is something I could definitely do if I wasn’t so hung up on maintaining my sea-going vessel. Spoze I could rent a boat whenever I wanted to go out, but I have enough hobbies right now.

If I lived on a lake, I’d definitely have a kayak. Cheers to the folks out there with kayaks. As JMK would say, “you’re thebomb.com.”

Father's Day 2005

We had a BBQ to celebrate Father's Day.

We miss you Brody!

Electric Energy- Poof! Crack!

The electro-magnetic field in my house has gone berserk, again.

Energy Occurrence #1
Poof! The fridge light burns out. Not a big deal.

Electronic Occurrence #2
The carbon monoxide detector in the basement flips out... starts beeping every 30 seconds... I call my dad, he tells me to call poison control, poison control tells me to call the fire department... three firemen later I learn that the damn thing is out of batteries. Embarrassing, but I'm alive and the incessant beeping has ceased, so whatever.

I thought to myself, "these things always happen in threes. I wonder what the third one is." Sure enough...

Bothersome, Thought-Provoking Electric Occurrence #3
My house phone, answering machine and all, is dead. The battery is rechargable because the phone is plugged in all the time. And of course the phone is plugged in, so WTF?

I put "spooky energy" in Google and clicked "Images" and got these (spooky?) teef. Come to think of it they do kind of remind me of Michael Jackson.

Elevator Ettiquette

Men in my building are not apprised of proper elevator etiquette. Allow me to state the obvious. Women are to get on and off the elevator first. Men get bonus points for appearing to hold the door, even though there is a sensor that keeps the door open if someone is walking through. Women are to exit the elevator in order of seniority. Grandmas first, then moms, then young hotties.

Grandma in an Elevator

(Note creepy ghosts surrounding her)

Super Cola! & Peer Pressure

I don't really have anything to say, but I felt like writing.

Yesterday I went to Uwajimaya (Asian Grocery Store) to grab some sushi, poke around the Hello Kitty section and laugh at the advertising. "Yummy Candy So Good!" I always buy crazy candy and the cool little rice crackers. I almost got some Green Tea in a can, but since I don't read Japanese and the label was Sapporo, I didn't want people at work thinking I'm chugging beer at my desk.

I got a cool Japanese bowl and put it on my desk with some "mystery candy" from Uwajimaya in it. It's colorfully wrapped and looks interesting so people grab it. Little do they know my "Super Cola" candy is extremely sour! So, this is what you do. Put disgusting candy on your desk and watch people barf on their way out of your office! That will keep the riff-raff, social talkers, 3pm bored-at-work wanderers away from your doorway. Mwa ha ha!

Tonight we're going swing dancing with some cool kids for my soccer team. What does a girl wear to an event such as this? Black skirt, red chucks? I'm lost.

Speaking of soccer. I've come to an important realization recently. When I was in high school, playing soccer, there was an inordinate amount of pressure to play in college. Rather than bond and cultivate tight friendships with my teammates, we were more competitive with each other than with anyone else. We were fighting for playing time. The peer-pressure, coach pressure, pressure of playing in college and of course the inevitable popularity contest that defines high school, made soccer un-fun.

Now I'm all grow'd up. A couple weeks ago, I saw two of the snobbiest girls at the indoor facility where I play. I've been out of high school for 6 years now and I thought things would be different. Perhaps they would act like nice humans. I said hi. We talked. And they were exactly the same! And I wondered how much of my life I'd wasted trying to get these girls to accept me.

Mean (Soccer) Girls

I'm so over it! There are cool people who can play soccer for fun, not blood. I'm into playing for the love of it, to promote the sport, to teach others to play better and to have fun. There are no scouts on the sidelines (though sometimes I pretend there are) and it's not about how many bars are on my letterman jacket. Sure I flaunt my soccer bruises like badges of honor, but that's also what I love about the sport.

And I thought I didn't have anything to say...

More Under-utilized Office Terms

“NO PRINTING--This is a bag build from items detailed on other worksheets”

“Whitespace is not allowed at this location.”

“I don’t want to randomize you, so let me know what’s on your to do list today.”

I swear they make these words up!

Paris Hilton to "Retire"??

Oh Believe it. She made national news with her statement!!

NEW YORK (AP) -- Paris Hilton plans to give up public life for family life.

The 24-year-old hotel heiress, star of "The Simple Life" reality series, tells Newsweek magazine that when she was younger, "I thought it was cute to play a dumb blonde. On TV, I do it because it's funny. I consider myself a businesswoman and a brand."
But Hilton says she plans to give up her public life in two years, by which time she expects to become a mother with her fiancé, Paris Latsis.

"I don't enjoy going out anymore," she says in the June 20 issue of the magazine, on newsstands Monday. "It's such a pain. It's everyone saying, 'Let's do a deal! Can I have a picture?' I'm just, like, 'These people are such losers. I can't believe I used to love doing this.' "

Under-Utilized Office Terms

I’m in a different world.

Yesterday I wore jean capris to work and didn’t feel guilty about it! At the law firms it would have been grounds for dismissal, or at least grounds for dirty looks.

Since I’ve been here, my head has been turned around in general conversation. I’m taking a crash course in a new language. I’ve listed some quotes below. What do you think they mean?

“Ping me on Monday.”
“This is a dog food distribution group.”
“He’s on the cc line due to “oops” status.”
“She’s an A dash, she’ll only be here a few months.”

Dukes of Jessica

It’s June 1 and Jessica Simpson (my new idol- post Britney) is shown in all the magazines romping around in her Dukes of Hazard short shorts. I know her tan is fake and she has some serious extensions, but you can’t fake a good bod. She spent two hours a day at the gym for the last 6 months.

It's Better than Diggin' a Ditch

I, on the other hand am not celebrating my fifth annual 21st birthday this July. Turning 26 literally strikes terror in my heart. This past year my metabolism gave me the finger.