Soccer Sucker

Oh my God. I just played an indoor soccer game and I suck! I am so out of shape that I single-handedly cost my team two goals. I'm the jerk who doesn't get back and defend. It's my fatal flaw and I'm so ashamed. This was my second game after my tonsils were removed last month. Back then I was healthy and hitting the gym regularly. I even scored 3 goals in one game! Now, I suck.

On a selfish, positive note, we lost by more than two which means that technically, I didn't cost us the game.

Gone are the high school days when I played on my school team, my select team and coached a recreational team. My muscles have deteriorated. During college I didn't play. I read lots of books. I was an English major, but I walked a lot. I lived between school and downtown Seattle and I'd walk to school and work. I began to fit into jeans! No more soccer thighs! It's a love-hate relationship when you can score from the 18-yard box on a free kick, but you can't wear a decent dress to the Homecoming dance.

At some point during college I reached athletic-jock-girl and pasty-prom-queen utopia when I finally fit into killer jeans.

Today though, I'd give your right arm to be either a jock or a pasty anything.