Chillin' in Maui

So here we are in Maui and here I am hating all the skinny bitches and staring through my shades disdainfully at the fat ones. At the pool I feel like I'm standing around in my underwear... and I am... and why am I so self-conscious about it all of a sudden? It's because I'm as chunky as Britney Spears, but lack the excuse of being pregnant.

We're staying at the Hyatt. This is a big hotel, at least 400 rooms. It has some serious pools and waterfalls and gardens and all the grass looks like astroturf. And the thing about Hawaii is that is always smells good. I don't know if there is some secret decree by the Hawaiian tourism association to spray good-smelling perfume everywhere, or if there's just enough hibiscus, ocean mist and coconut suntan lotion to keep everything snifforific. I've been taking pictures, but I forgot the cord for the camera, so I can't post them. I will when we get home.

This morning I enjoyed a Lomi Lomi massage and a pedicure at the Moana Spa. It's the best weekday morning I've had in a while.

It's time to head down to the pool. I think I'm going to hit the ocean instead and float like a jellyfish for a while. There is supposed to be some good snorkeling out there. I bought goggles.

Tomorrow we're having dinner at a luau to celebrate our 3rd anniversary.

*** (Later)

So, turns out taking a chintzy pool raft into the ocean wasn't the most brilliant idea. I lasted about two minutes until I was tossed like a floating coconut. With salt water up my nose and injured pride I scanned the beach wondering if anyone noticed my idiocy. People were nice, they averted their eyes when I approached with my pink raft and unfortunate hair. The raft was left under my pool chair, never to be seen again. And I paid 30% extra for the damn thing since I bought it at the hotel shop.

My Harry Potter-obsessed husband and I have been reading non-stop. I'm on my third book. This one is a bit saucy, but calling it a "Romance Novel" cheapens it. There is no speak of "pulsing loins" or "bulging packages" but there is a love/lust story within.

JMK, to answer your question, I started reading these types of novels while getting my friend to start reading again. I knew that if she read about something interesting, she would be able to pick up a novel without feeling the dread, or pressure to finish it. And it worked and we share all our books and they're fun, except for that "No Strings" one. (See below.)

I'm turning in, so as not be be a slave to the blog. Tomorrow's plans call for the quest for skin cancer (the pool) and I have been applying my SPF right before I apply the baby oil.